A Brutal Message, But It May Be Just What Some Of Your Franchisees Need To Hear!

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Perhaps you’ve heard about the phone message that a high school in Queensland, Australia recorded for parents to hear when they called to complain about failing grades for their children? Apparently a group of parents is suing the school to demand that failing grades be changed to passing grades for students who were absent 15 to 30 times during a semester and who did not complete enough school work to pass their classes.

Message hits home

I don’t vouch for the authenticity of the message, but it doesn’t matter if it’s true or not. The message hits home in other countries, and especially in America where we’ve cultivated the entitlement society. As I listened to the message (and enjoyed a good laugh) it occurred to me that a modified message could serve numerous franchisors who get unwarranted complaints from franchisees (and each franchisor would know the identity of said franchisees.)

After listening to the message you might enjoy my pithy rewrites (feel free to use them in your recording!). . . and if you’re brave enough, please share any rewrites that come to your mind (though I doubt it’s as wicked as mine.)

Message for complaining franchisees

The message would go like this . . .

In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member please listen to all the options before making a selection.

To lie about why you didn’t pay your royalty, press 1.

To make excuses for why you did not attend convention, press 2.

To swear at a staff member, press 3.

To ask why you didn’t get information that was already included in your franchise newsletter (several times) press 4.

If you want us to operate your franchise for you, press 5.

If you want to reach out and punch someone, press 6.

This is the real world

And that’s not all . . . the franchisor who’s as bold as the high school leaders in Australia might add, as they did, this advice:

If you realize this is the real world and you must be accountable and responsible for your behavior, and the performance of your franchise, and it’s not the franchisor’s fault for your lack of effort, please hang up and have a nice day.

Somewhere in there I bet you can find some New Year’s resolutions!

Meanwhile, I’m working on a pithy rewrite for franchisees who’d like to give their franchisor a dose of the real world! Fair is fair. And it may be just what some franchisors need to hear!